Wednesday, May 9, 2012

North Carolinians Thrilled to give their Grandchildren Something to Apologize About

Delmar Hardtack: continuing a storied
lineage of ignorant bigotry.

Durham, NC
8 May, 2012

For years, Delmar Hardtack walked the streets of Durham in shame. Hat in hand, he averted the gaze of his elders, choosing to stare at his shoes rather than meet the older generation eye-to-eye.

“It was embarrassing,” he said. “My parents and grandparents had been such unrestrained bigots—what with slavery and then racial segregation. They beat teenagers for using the ‘white restaurants,’ for crissake! My Generation hadn’t done [anything]!”

But Hardtack’s long-suffering embarrassment finally cracked open this past Tuesday when 61% of North Carolinians voted to deny gays and lesbians the basic rights of civil union.

“It’s a weight lifted,” Hardtack smiles, “to finally live up to the standard of ignorant bigotry set by my forebears.”

When reminded of a similar law prohibiting interracial marriages from the 1800’s—and its eventual reversal—Delmar nodded with a knowing grin.

“It’s passing on the tradition, one generation to the next” he said. “I’m always apologizing for my grandparent’s horrible, horrible racism… I’m proud to finally give my grandkids something to apologize about after I’m gone.”

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